Episode 2753: Ship Happens

Mar. 17th, 2026 09:11 am
[syndicated profile] darths_and_droids_feed

Episode 2753: Ship Happens

It's amazing how often we see vehicles designed for space flight end up submerged in water, and then emerge fully functional. They must really over-engineer those things.

In general, things surviving where they really shouldn't can be a great theme for co-opting into a game. Imagine a magical tome that unexpectedly survives a fire that turns all around it into ash. Or the classic creature frozen in ice, which returns to life when thawed out. A shipwreck where the ship is somehow still intact, and the interior spaces are still dry, preserving things that would normally have long rotted away.

Any time something happens that should be destructive, you can sprinkle in some object that unexpectedly survived. Now you have an instant adventure hook.

aurilee writes:

Commentary by memnarch (who has not seen the movie)

Aw, Luke didn't even give Rey a chance to raise the X-wing up! At least she could have tried before the old master showed off by lifting the ship up. Definitely looks in better shape than when it was stuck on Dagobah though!

And whoops! That's rather awkward for Corey. I guess that never came up in any of the talk, otherwise he probably wouldn't have picked that metaphor to start with. I think I'd pick rust as the cancer metaphor replacement. It seems to grow if you don't pay attention and take care of it quickly, rusted objects take a lot of work to clean and they're never quite the same afterwards, and it'll eventually destroy whatever it's taken hold in if left alone. And as a bonus, rust doesn't seem to be that common in Star Wars, so as an in-character statement, that'd be even scarier than an evil space fungus. You could probably pick up at least a couple of those by just running off into the jungle around the current Resistance base.

Transcript

beatrice_otter: All true wealth is biological (Wealth)
[personal profile] beatrice_otter posting in [community profile] fancake
Fandom: Vorkosigan
Pairings/Characters: Gregor Vorbarra, Ivan Vorpatril
Rating: Gen
Length: 7k
Creator Links: [archiveofourown.org profile] callmecasandra 
Theme: siblings, AU, fork in the road, family, gen, old fandoms, book fandoms

Summary: Gregor need not have worried.

Reccer's Notes: Gregor Vorbarra is Emperor of Barrayar, and he has monsters in his family tree. His father Serg was a rapist and a murderer who died when he was a small child (and Serg's own father Emperor Ezar arranged his death), and his great uncle was Mad Emperor Yuri who was paranoid and homicidal and awful. Gregor understandably has issues about his family.

But what if Ezar had seen the sort of person Serg was, and how many monsters are in the family tree, and not only made sure Serg died before inheriting the throne, but also ... made sure that Serg would not father the next emperor of Barrayar?

This is a short but compelling AU. The series is marked incomplete, but there are no dangling plot threads and it hasn't been updated in over a decade.

Fanwork Links: The Cuckoo
beatrice_otter: Luke and Leia on the Death Star (Luke and Leia)
[personal profile] beatrice_otter posting in [community profile] fancake
Fandom: Star Wars
Pairings/Characters: Leia Organa
Rating: Gen
Length: 2k
Creator Links: [archiveofourown.org profile] Darkmagyk 
Theme: siblings, gen, family,

Summary: “We were very close.” Sola says, and Leia smiles her politician's smile in response.

This woman is convinced she and her sister were the best of friends. And she’s telling the secret daughter, from a secret marriage, all about it.

Leia doesn't need the force to know it wasn't true.

Reccer's Notes: This is about Padmé and her sister Sola, but it's also about Luke and Leia, and about family, and about memory.

Fanwork Links: Lonely In Your Company
beatrice_otter: Captain America (Captain America)
[personal profile] beatrice_otter posting in [community profile] fancake
Fandom: Captain America
Characters/Pairings: Steve/Bucky
Rating: G
Length: 16,400 words
Creator Links: [profile] odsbodkins
Theme: Outside POV, siblings, female characters, gen, 

Summary: Becca Barnes is eight years old, and her big brother can do no wrong. The events of the two Captain America movies, from the perspective of one of the sisters Bucky leaves behind.

Reccer's Notes: This story has an excellent child's perspective, and a deep and abiding love between Becca and Bucky. It's lovely and it makes me cry.

Fanwork Links: My Brother, the Hero
mific: (McShep Silhouette)
[personal profile] mific posting in [community profile] fancake
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Characters/Pairings: John Sheppard/Rodney McKay, Jeannie Miller, Jack O'Neill
Rating: Explicit
Length: 23,191, 02:40:45
Content Notes: no AO3 warnings apply.
spoilery content noteRodney and John weren't raised as brothers, but they discover they are. After having fucked. This causes some angst for a while, and Rodney's rationalisations are amusing.

Creator Links: speranza on AO3, speranza's own site

Themes: Siblings, Action/adventure, Family, AU, AU - fork in the road

Summary: "Jean isn't your sister," Rodney said, speaking to John as if he was a small child. "Jean is my sister."

Reccer's Notes: Written as a slightly cracky Harlequin fic, this is a favourite story of mine, full of action, adventure, and family complications. John and Rodney meet at Patrick Sheppard's funeral and afterwards happen on an alien artifact at his apartment. A wild ride ensues as they try to get it to Area 51. Rodney's a physicist and John's air force, but at the start, neither of them know about the Stargate program. There's lots of excellent drama, romance, and snark as they gradually discover all the secrets their parents hid from them.

Fanwork Links: Last Will and Testament on speranza's site, and on AO3
And I podficced the story

erinptah: (pyramid)
[personal profile] erinptah
Two offers:

1) Anybody want a small postage scale? 

Works on items up to 5 pounds. I used it on Leif & Thorn shipments for a few years, but packages with the full backlist weigh 11+ pounds at this point. (The scale I use now works up to 90 pounds. It'll last me a while.)

If you're in the US, I'll mail it to you for free. Just DM me a shipping address. First person who asks will get it -- I'll update this post if/when it's claimed.

(If you're outside the US, the shipping cost will be so high that you're better off just buying one.)

2) Anybody want a paid Dreamwidth account? 

Comment and say so. No other requirements. I'll send 350 DW points (enough to buy all the Paid Account extra features for 1 year) to the first 10 commenters who ask.

Every time a news story comes out about other social-media sites kicking their users in the shins, I appreciate DW a little more. Right now, I want to show that appreciation with money. Help me out by giving me something to spend it on.
delphi: An illustrated crow kicks a little ball of snow with a contemplative expression. (Default)
[personal profile] delphi
The first season of Star Trek: Starfleet Academy just wrapped up, and man, that was a season of television that did my heart good.

I didn't initially think this show was going to be for me. Hopefully it goes without saying that this wasn't for any of the range of awful reasons people have wanted to hang a grievance or grift on it. Media with protagonists in their teens and twenties just usually aren't my thing, and so while I was glad to see Trek branching out, I went in aware I wasn't the target audience and figured I'd watch an episode or two to see if any of the older characters appealed to me.

Well, they definitely did. Free-spirited, complex, centuries-old school chancellor Nahla Ake might be my favourite character I've met this year. I am in love with her. The Doctor (from Voyager) and Jett Reno (from Discovery) are both back in supporting roles with some really wonderful scenes, and Jett has a hot and hilarious Klingon/Jem'Hadar wife (Lura Thok) who is definitely worth moving across the galaxy for.

But to my surprise, I also really love the kids! Not all the moments landed for me, but I ended up legitimately invested in their coming-of-age stories and journey into becoming a little family. I don't want to spoil some of the things I loved, but I am always here for mentorship, adoptive parent-child relationships, and queer romance, and I wasn't disappointed. Add in some good solid science fiction and a lot of classic Trek optimism and belief in the work of building a better world, and this was exactly what I needed right now. My only real complaint is that it was such a short season.

Books read, early March

Mar. 16th, 2026 08:50 pm
mrissa: (Default)
[personal profile] mrissa
 

Ruth Awad, Set to Music a Wildfire. A poetry collection that is very directly about her experiences as a daughter of a Lebanese immigrant and her father's experiences in Lebanon. Interesting but not particularly subtle; I'm not sure it's fair to demand subtlety on these topics.

M.H. Ayinde, A Song of Legends Lost. A thumping big fantasy. Did I read this because one of the characters is eating plantains very early on and I love plantains? Well. That wasn't the only reason. But the things it said about the worldbuilding drew me in and kept me going for many hundred pages.

Shane Bobrycki, The Crowd in the Early Middle Ages. Bobrycki noticed a gaping hole between the Roman Empire and the Renaissance when it came to the influence of large group behavior in Europe, and this book is him examining what we know about that, what crowds there actually were, what impact they had on the life of their cultures and why. He manages to remember that Europe does not just mean Italy at first and later France and England, which is always nice.

Eliane Boey, Club Contango. I really like Boey's prose, and this started out well for me, but as the narrative bore inexorably down on the plot twist and I could no longer pretend it would not be that particular plot twist--which I had foreseen at the very beginning and really hoped it would not be--I grew more and more frustrated. Here's hoping her next thing doesn't lean on a twist of that particular sort.

Sarah E. Bond, Strike: Labor, Unions, and Resistance in the Roman Empire. Bond is clear and explicit about where she's drawing parallels between modern unions and ancient groups that have similar traits, and she's willing to make her arguments about them specific rather than handwavey. A corrective for too much of the assumption that the people of the past were not like us, and an angle on the ancient world more interesting to me than most.

Michael Brown, The Wars of Scotland, 1214-1371. Definitely what it says on the tin, from the top-down perspective rather than anything about what these wars were like for the rank and file. Did you know the Scots were not a restful people in this era? welp.

Steph Cherrywell, The Ink Witch. I loved this so much. It's MG fantasy that's actually funny rather than adult-trying-too-hard, it's got ink magic and a tarantula familiar and a lovely fierce trans heroine whose plot is not about being trans, it's about magic quests and family politics and mermaids and yeti and running a little motel. It's so great, I'm so happy about this book.

P.F. Chisholm, A Taste of Witchcraft. At this point in this series (this is book 10, don't start here), we are no longer talking about an historical murder mystery series but more generally an historical adventure series. This one goes very, very vividly into the tortures accused witches suffered, so if you're not feeling up for that, maybe not this one. It also features quite a bit of my favorite characters in the series, though.

Sunyi Dean, The Girl With a Thousand Faces. Discussed elsewhere.

Nicola Griffith, She Is Here. A short collection of essays, poems, and short stories. Most of the essays were familiar to me from previous sources, but they go well here thematically. I love Griffith's novels, but her shorter work does not feel as strong or essential to me. For me this is a nice-to-have, not a must-have.

Bassem Khandaqji, A Mask the Color of the Sky. A novel about a young Palestinian man who has aspirations in both archaeology and fiction--who is writing a novel about Mary Magdalen, or trying to--who looks at the wider world and wants a wider life. And then he finds an ID that will allow him, with his particular appearance, to readily pass as a Jewish Israeli, and he does that for a while, and it's the sort of book where the complications are primarily internal, emotional, mental, about his place in the world and his identity, rather than thriller novel shooty-shoot complications. It's short and fairly straightforward.

Margrit Pernau, Emotions and Temporalities. Kindle. This is one of a series of short monographs that I downloaded a while ago, and it's the first where I've really felt that the format limited content beyond what was useful. I wanted a lot more context on emotionality and assessments of past/present/future in the cultures Pernau was discussing; I felt like more and longer examples would have strongly benefitted her argument. Ah well, I'm told you can't win them all.

Dana Simpson, Unicorn Secrets. This is the latest of a collection of daily strips of the comic Phoebe & Her Unicorn, which I don't read daily, I read them in collection form. It is nice and fun and nice. Is this the best of them, no, but it does what I wanted it to do, it is a pleasant diversion.

Dodie Smith, I Capture the Castle. Reread. So one of the things I didn't fully notice when I read this the first time, 25 years ago on a friend's futon waiting for another friend's wedding, is that this is an almost perfect balance of Victorian and modern novel. Specifically: money is allowed to be the main concern. Money is discussed in detail, what food you can get for it and what clothes and what marriage will do about it and how we feel about that. Marriage is still considered to be the main way that women handle money, but no longer the only way (and the ending makes that matter rather than blurring to a romantic "isn't it lovely that the marrying couple just happens to have enough funds after all?" that some of the other books both Victorian and modern fall back on). It is very matter-of-fact about sex and sexuality for its publication date, but not in a smarmy or overbalanced way. This is also one of fiction's non-evil stepmothers, and bless her for that.

D.E. Stevenson, Miss Buncle's Book. Kindle. A very gentle comedy about a spinster in a small village who writes a novel with keen observations of all her neighbors and sets the whole town on its ear. I'm fascinated by the line Stevenson manages to walk between letting the Great Depression feel real (Miss Buncle needs her book to make her money! it's not quite as money-focused as I Capture the Castle but still) and still keeping it upbeat for the people who were reading the book as an escape from that very same Great Depression. Not terribly deep, fairly predictable in its larger plot though not necessarily in its scene incidentals, fun all the same.

Ethan Tapper, How to Love a Forest: The Bittersweet Work of Tending a Changing World. I was a bit disappointed in this, which aims at being a lyrical memoir of a life in forestry. The lyricism is repetitive (which is harder to forgive considering how short this volume is) and in places twee (writing some sections about himself in the third person as "the man" did not work for me), and in general there was a great deal less how than I hoped for. He talked about what he was doing, he even talked in general terms about those who might not understand how killing plants could help a forest ecosystem. But as it was memoir rather than science essay, he felt no need to go into the evidence behind his positions--and, crucially, actions.

Jo Walton and Ada Palmer, Trace Elements: Conversations on the Project of Science Fiction and Fantasy. Discussed elsewhere.

RingedPlover of Bluster

Mar. 16th, 2026 09:08 pm
[personal profile] ismo
I have finished ferrying ALL the books that were downstairs to another location upstairs, a literally Sisyphean task, since I move them up only so they can later roll back down. I did not quite realize how many there are. And yet, almost all of them are dear to me. There were a few of which I thought, "Meh, maybe not put that one back on the shelf." But I have strictly restrained myself from making any selections at this time. That is not the task for today.

The Sparrowhawk went to the gym. It started blizzarding while he was on the way home. I was quite worried, but he said it wasn't doing that where he was until he was within five minutes of home. This morning, he was out doing the money counting when the service rep from the reclamation cleaners arrived. He seemed a pleasant and competent kind of guy. He looked the situation over and went off to make an estimate, which we accepted very promptly, because as I said in one of my novels back in the paleolithic, need is an iron master. Tomorrow morning the cleaners will arrive and rip out the soaked carpet and clean everything with antimicrobial soap, and dry it all out with giant fans. They suggested arriving at 8:30 or 9, and the Sparrowhawk tactfully said 9 would be good. I bet they come at 8:30 anyway. I hope to be ready.
davidgillon: Text: You can take a heroic last stand against the forces of darkness. Or you can not die. It's entirely up to you" (Heroic Last Stand)
[personal profile] davidgillon

 Given President Bonespurs is whinging about the European nations, and the UK in particular, not queueing up to join the war he started without consulting them*, I thought I'd look up the precise wording of Article 5 of the NATO Treaty.

"Article 5

The Parties agree that an armed attack against one or more of them in Europe or North America shall be considered an attack against them all and consequently they agree that, if such an armed attack occurs, each of them, in exercise of the right of individual or collective self-defence recognised by Article 51 of the Charter of the United Nations, will assist the Party or Parties so attacked"

Mutual defence against an armed attack on a NATO power in Europe or North America, does not give Trump the right to drag NATO into an offensive war he started in the Gulf, without consulting them, no matter what he might think. 

This is why NATO never got involved in Vietnam, and why Kennedy and Nixon didn't throw a tantrum over it.

Meanwhile there's a pretty good argument Pete Hegseth committed a war crime at his press conference on Friday, which takes a truly special level of stupidity.

Hegseth: "no mercy, no quarter!"*.

Hague Convention of 1907, Regulations: Art. 23: "In addition to the prohibitions provided by special Conventions, it is especially forbidden

....

(d) To declare that no quarter will be given;"

As a former officer Hegseth should know that, and if he doesn't, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, standing next to him, definitely should.

* He may have forgotten accusing all the Coalition powers of staying away from the front lines of Afghanistan just a couple of months ago, but the other NATO nations haven't. As you sow, etc

** At least Hegseth stopped short of yelling "Deus Vult!", but it's still some Crusader-level shit and you can bet the Gulf powers noticed.

 

 

 

 

 


10trueloves: overprotective

Mar. 16th, 2026 08:25 pm
senmut: a bright blue tribal seahorse (General: Tribal Seahorse)
[personal profile] senmut
AO3 Link | Reasons (300 words) by Merfilly
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) [2020]
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Dinah Lance ~ Renee Montoya
Characters: Dinah Lance, Renee Montoya
Additional Tags: Triple Drabble, Canon Typical Violence, Complicated Relationships
Summary:

Dinah can't handle being the reason... but can see why.



Reasons

"What the fuck was that?"

Renee looked at the singer turned vigilante and didn't have a great answer for her, Dinah just knew, seeing it in the woman's fading fear — for Dinah — and the drop of her eyes.

"Got a little nervy is all," she decided to say. "Cop reflexes, all that."

Dinah's eyes went narrow, before she sucked in a breath and spun away, unleashing the full Cry on the alley, stopping the gang advance, pinning several with trash bins and debris from the sheer force of it.

Her gaze flicked to the rapist-murderer laying there, dead from a single shot through his forehead.

"Let's get outta here." She stalked off, knowing good and damn well no one would look too close into the death, that Renee wouldn't pay the price for the killing —

— but Dinah would have rather never have been the reason Renee squeezed off the round.

Renee followed; Dinah hadn't told her not to, and they really needed to hash this out without Harley or the kid or anyone else butting in.

"You held your mom's death against me for years."

The quiet words, spoken three blocks over, threw cold water on Dinah's temper.

"I don't. Not now. She… she made choices too."

"Yeah, but… I knew what those choices cost you, and I hate it. I can't… you… I need you to make it out of this shit alive."

Dinah took a breath, then another, before she put a hand on Renee's forearm. "Goes both ways, now. I need you to keep breathing, kicking ass with me, and make it count when we finally decide we can walk away.

"Not for mom. For me."

"Yeah, I get that. I'm going to try harder to remember you make your own choices, but it's hard."

"Always is."

[#292 | Daydreaming] Voting Post

Mar. 16th, 2026 09:16 pm
fanweeklymod: (Default)
[personal profile] fanweeklymod posting in [community profile] fandomweekly
Here are the entries for this challenge:

List of entries )

Please Note: Because we only have 4 entries this week, there is only a First Place and Runner Up to vote for!

In order to vote, please reply to this post using the form provided. All comments are screened, and entries are listed in the order they were submitted. For your vote to qualify, you must fill out your entire voting card (both spots) in order to be counted. Winner votes are worth 2 points, Runner Up votes are worth 1 point. Meeting the bonus goal on an entry gets an extra point for that submission.

When voting, please copy/paste the ENTRY NUMBER and the FIC TITLE from the list above into the spot you're voting for (this prevents accidentally mis-numbering a vote and casting it for the wrong entry). It should look like this:

First Place: 61. Fic Title Here
Runner Up: 88. Another Fic Title

Please note that you cannot vote for your own entry, and that votes cannot be made anonymously. You do not have to be a member of the community in order to vote, nor have submitted an entry for this week; everyone is welcome to participate in the voting. IP addresses are logged to prevent duplicate voting.



Voting closes Wednesday, March 18 at 9:00PM EST.

(no subject)

Mar. 16th, 2026 07:13 pm
boxofdelights: (Default)
[personal profile] boxofdelights
Tilda is a Hungry Thing. She had an allergic inflammation in her ear, which led to seven days of Apoquel (wrapped in a tiny bit of cheese) twice a day, and then seven days of Apoquel once a day. Today is the first day she _didn't_ get the Apoquel after dinner. She has been following me around giving me this LOOK ever since.
Hungry Thing )

Fossils

Mar. 16th, 2026 05:30 pm
ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)
[personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
The Kotlin Crisis: Earth’s first mass extinction may have been far worse than previously believed

Fossils of the first sea creatures, long assumed to have vanished before a major mass extinction about 550 million years ago called the Kotlin Crisis, have now been found and are providing new details about that time period.

This discovery transforms what once looked like a routine species decline in Earth’s early history into what may be the first catastrophic extinction in animal history.



Second, actually, after the Great Farting Oxygen Event changed the atmosphere from reducing to oxydizing -- almost everything died, except a few archaea that found anoxic refuges and a few organisms that figured out how to use oxygen. But most people forget about that one.

Read more... )

(no subject)

Mar. 16th, 2026 10:16 pm
beccaelizabeth: my Watcher tattoo in blue, plus Be in red Buffy style font (Default)
[personal profile] beccaelizabeth
Tumblr staff broke tumblr
by changing how reblogs and replies and comments and EVERYthing works
and as far as I can figure this may mean
tumblr staff can't see all of the reblogs that tell them they broke tumblr
unless they reblog directly from staff.
which is a level of broke that is Special.

Apparently it breaks blocking and breaks the ability to make things unreblogable.
people are still testing that but it sounds. bad.

tumblr not looking great right now.
china_shop: Zhao Yunlan stretched out on a stool. (Guardian - ZYL sprawled on a stool)
[personal profile] china_shop posting in [community profile] sid_guardian
Poll #34373 Clothes
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 9


How emphatic are your opinions on Shen Wei’s Haixing clothes?

View Answers

Not (clothes are clothes)
1 (11.1%)

Not with a few exceptions (accessories)
0 (0.0%)

Not with a few exceptions (outfits)
1 (11.1%)

Somewhat
2 (22.2%)

Very
4 (44.4%)

Extremely
1 (11.1%)

I will fight you!
0 (0.0%)

I didn't use to, but fandom has made me care
1 (11.1%)

How emphatic are your opinions on Zhao Yunlan's clothes?

View Answers

Not (clothes are clothes)
1 (11.1%)

Not with a few exceptions
1 (11.1%)

Somewhat
3 (33.3%)

Very
3 (33.3%)

Extremely
1 (11.1%)

I've papered my bedroom with screencaps of him in that grey sweater and distressed jeans
2 (22.2%)

What does Zhao Yunlan find sexiest about the Envoy? (check all that apply)

View Answers

mystery
7 (77.8%)

super-strength
3 (33.3%)

other powers
2 (22.2%)

authority
5 (55.6%)

mercy
6 (66.7%)

mouth
5 (55.6%)

eyelashes
6 (66.7%)

those slight, faint-hint-of-amusement smiles
7 (77.8%)

weapon
1 (11.1%)

the fact that Zhao Yunlan's father would strongly disapprove
3 (33.3%)

other (please specify in comments)
1 (11.1%)

Which of these best describes you?

View Answers

I speak/read Mandarin well / It's my first language
0 (0.0%)

I'm learning Mandarin
3 (33.3%)

I'm learning Mandarin because of Guardian
1 (11.1%)

I've picked up a few words
4 (44.4%)

I don't know any Mandarin but I'd like to learn
0 (0.0%)

Don’t know anything, languages are haaard
1 (11.1%)

No Mandarin, but I know (an)other Asian language(s)
1 (11.1%)

Other
0 (0.0%)

Birdfeeding

Mar. 16th, 2026 04:29 pm
ysabetwordsmith: Cartoon of me in Wordsmith persona (Default)
[personal profile] ysabetwordsmith
Today is cloudy and frigid, spitting snow and howling wind. :/  It stormed last night.

I fed the birds.  I've seen a small mixed flock of sparrows and house finches, plus several cardinals.

I put out water for the birds.
musesfool: mel king from the pitt with a smiley face (happy to be here)
[personal profile] musesfool
Oscar winner Michael B Jordan! Woohoo! I did not watch the Oscars but I am so happy for MBJ!

Also for Kpop Demon Hunters and "Golden!"

Here are two links I enjoyed this morning:

= Don't Fence Ted McGinley In (NYT gift link) (also, spoilers for aired episodes of Shrinking)

= 'The Pitt,' as Told by Its Patients

*

How to Bear Your Loneliness

Mar. 16th, 2026 12:00 pm
[syndicated profile] the_marginalian_feed

Posted by Maria Popova

“We are cheating ourselves when we run away from the ambiguity of loneliness.”


How to Bear Your Loneliness

“You are born alone. You die alone. The value of the space in between is trust and love,” the artist Louise Bourgeois wrote in her diary. How much trust and love we wrest from life and lavish upon life is largely a matter of how well we have befriended our existential loneliness — a fundamental fact of every human existence that coexists with our delicate interconnectedness, each a parallel dimension of our lived reality, each pulsating beneath our days.

In When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times (public library) — her timeless field guide to transformation through difficult times — the Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön explores what it takes to cultivate “a nonthreatening relationship with loneliness,” to transmute it into a different kind of “relaxing and cooling loneliness” that subverts our ordinary terror of the existential void.

Sunlit Solitude by Maria Popova. (Available as a print.)

She writes:

When we draw a line down the center of a page, we know who we are if we’re on the right side and who we are if we’re on the left side. But we don’t know who we are when we don’t put ourselves on either side. Then we just don’t know what to do. We just don’t know. We have no reference point, no hand to hold. At that point we can either freak out or settle in. Contentment is a synonym for loneliness, cool loneliness, settling down with cool loneliness. We give up believing that being able to escape our loneliness is going to bring any lasting happiness or joy or sense of well-being or courage or strength. Usually we have to give up this belief about a billion times, again and again making friends with our jumpiness and dread, doing the same old thing a billion times with awareness. Then without our even noticing, something begins to shift. We can just be lonely with no alternatives, content to be right here with the mood and texture of what’s happening.

In Buddhism, all suffering is a form of resistance to reality, a form of attachment to desires and ideas about how the world should be. By befriending our loneliness, we begin to meet reality on its own terms and to find contentment with the as-is nature of life, complete with all of its uncertainty. Chödrön writes:

We are fundamentally alone, and there is nothing anywhere to hold on to. Moreover, this is not a problem. In fact, it allows us to finally discover a completely unfabricated state of being. Our habitual assumptions — all our ideas about how things are — keep us from seeing anything in a fresh, open way… We don’t ultimately know anything. There’s no certainty about anything. This basic truth hurts, and we want to run away from it. But coming back and relaxing with something as familiar as loneliness is good discipline for realizing the profundity of the unresolved moments of our lives. We are cheating ourselves when we run away from the ambiguity of loneliness.

Lone Man by Rockwell Kent, 1919. (Available as a print and as stationery cards.)

So faced, loneliness becomes a kind of mirror — one into which we must look with maximum compassion, one that beams back to us our greatest strength:

Cool loneliness allows us to look honestly and without aggression at our own minds. We can gradually drop our ideals of who we think we ought to be, or who we think we want to be, or who we think other people think we want to be or ought to be. We give it up and just look directly with compassion and humor at who we are. Then loneliness is no threat and heartache, no punishment. Cool loneliness doesn’t provide any resolution or give us ground under our feet. It challenges us to step into a world of no reference point without polarizing or solidifying. This is called the middle way, or the sacred path of the warrior.

Complement with Rachel Carson on the relationship between loneliness and creativity and Barry Lopez on the cure for our existential loneliness, then revisit poet May Sarton’s splendid century-old ode to the art of being contentedly alone.


donating = loving

For seventeen years, I have been spending hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars each month composing The Marginalian (which bore the outgrown name Brain Pickings for its first fifteen years). It has remained free and ad-free and alive thanks to patronage from readers. I have no staff, no interns, no assistant — a thoroughly one-woman labor of love that is also my life and my livelihood. If this labor makes your own life more livable in any way, please consider lending a helping hand with a donation. Your support makes all the difference.


newsletter

The Marginalian has a free weekly newsletter. It comes out on Sundays and offers the week’s most inspiring reading. Here’s what to expect. Like? Sign up.

Powered by Dreamwidth Studios